Rule #1: What’s Mine Isn’t Yours
People always say that possession is nine tenths of the law – I don’t study law so I can’t really tell if that’s true or not. All I know is that possession is one of the most important issues to a server which and that is why I chose the above to be rule numero uno of The Server’s Code.
Since the dawn of time, all waiters and waitresses have uttered the same four words that they don’t actually mean to be taken literally: I need a break. Translation: I need to take five minutes to scream at the top of my lungs inside the freezer before I pimp slap the next person who asks me for dressing on the side. That or “If I don’t get some nicotine coursing through my veins in the next five minutes there is going to be a massacre on the line.”
And since servers are used to having their requests ignored, no one ever thought the day would come when the government stepped in and ordered managers to give their servers just that – a government mandated break.
Now, before we go any further, this concept mainly applies to those of us who have worked in corporate restaurants. I did work for a mom and pop place for a few months and while they never really gave me a “break”, I didn’t really mind because they were so nice and appreciative of my work. Corporate, on the other hand, is a horse of a much different color…
For those of us who have worked for corporate, your “break” is the five seconds it takes you to swallow the french fries you snagged off table 45’s plate before it got run out of the kitchen or the two minutes in which you managed to suck down an entire Marlboro menthol. There was never any set period of time during which you were not supposed to be hauling ass, picking up your coworkers’ slack (you know – that one server who never puts a steak knife down) and pretending like you care what your manager is rambling on about.
But then one day, it happened and we thought our prayers were answered. The government had finally stepped up and took a stand for the little guy. Little did we know our problems were just beginning…