#2 – The Mattress, Part XI

In our drunken stupor, Erin, George and I had neglected to align the mattress with the direction of the road.  We were now heading straight for the curb at an alarming speed.  I had looked at down at the mattress only to realize there was no steering mechanism as George hurled his body onto the mattress as we flew faster and faster through the freshly fallen snow.

What happened next was like a deleted scene from Christopher Nolan’s Inception.  We hit the curb at a full 15 mph (I assume).  George pushed forward into Erin as the back of the mattress pushed upward from the inertia of making contact with the curb, causing Erin to hurl me forward into what appeared to be a very large tree.

It was as though I was removed from myself – I came out of my body to witness it going forward in slow motion towards the tree, my head colliding with its bark, Erin and George running close behind me.


I awoke in Erin’s bed the next day with a headache that rivaled the morning after my 21st birthday (don’t worry, we’ll get to that).  I looked around to see Erin sleeping soundly in LaShaunna’s bed, George curled up and surrounded by empty cans of Natty Lite on the floor.

As I attempted to get up from the bed, I let out a scream, waking George and Erin.  “Lilo!” Erin gasped, coming to check on me, “Thank god you’re all right.  We thought you might be dead.”
“Why didn’t you take me to the hospital?” I asked, feeling around to see where the pain was coming from.
“We were going to,” George grumbled, rising from the cans, “but you were breathing.”
“What the hell happened?/” I asked, finally locating the source of my pain.

Erin and George looked at each other with the widest of smiles as George turned to me and said, “Lilo…it was amazing.  We made contact…and you were airborne!”


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