Dealing with Doubt

The first day of classes is approaching fast, which means the monster of doubt is growing.

The MFA Years

Image: Romain Toornier 

My first day of classes is in twenty-three days and all I can think about is not going. I have this vision of raising my hand after attendance is taken and saying, “Excuse me, Professor, you didn’t call my name.” He’ll scan the list one more time, shake his head, and tell me to go to the main office down the hall, on the right. I’ll slide my notebook back into my bag and try not to focus on those watching me leave the classroom.

I’ll explain my situation to a woman behind the front desk, and wait anxiously as she types away on her keyboard. And then I’ll see it—the “oh shit” face – and know something is wrong. She won’t even excuse herself to me—she’ll just speed into the office behind her, point to me, and nod her head.

“I’m so sorry, Ms. Sharkey,” she’ll say…

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One thought on “Dealing with Doubt

  1. Lauren, I wish you all the best in your studies. Congratulations on going on for your Master’s Degree. I know you worked so hard to achieve your goals. You have a great talent for writing. I know we haven’t talked in a long while but I I want to make amends to you. I am an extremely proud Aunt and I hope all your dreams come true. Aunt Mary Ellen

    Date: Sun, 2 Aug 2015 00:29:21 +0000e b To: stuartme@live.com

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